The last month of the academic year was sort of rough for me - a lot of stress about defending my thesis, passing exams and interview to be able to continue in my studies etc. And now, when everything is over, I cannot help it but feel depressed. I must admit that I really was going totally out of control in the past few weeks, which meant that not only I have suffered, but also the closest people around me who had to deal with me and tried to talk me out of it every single day.
Now I am at my parents place in Slovakia again, having a little break, being taken care of and cooked to and also knotting like crazy! Even during exams I discovered that making bracelets helps my mood - playing with colours, while I can clear the bad stuff from my mind and create something pretty. And not only that, but also the possibility of selling it one day to earn money, which makes me feel like I'm actually doing something. Also it is an easy thing to do, I was concentrating on the easier patterns, so it cannot happen that I would get it wrong and get even more sad about how useless I am. So making bracelets is now both useful and practical :-}
I'm sorry to hear you've had a difficult end of the year. School can be so stressful but I'm happy to hear that working on your bracelets is giving you some joy as well as way to decompress. I used to be a PhD student and after every advisor meeting that I felt went terribly I would have an arts and crafts night and make cards or teach myself how to decorate cakes. I wish Etsy was around then. The idea of someone liking your work to the extent that they'd be willing to buy it is incredibly validating.
ReplyDeleteRelax. Enjoy your break. Everything will be fine.
I have a lovely advisor/supervisor. But I think I am not good at handling stress and te final state exams simply feel like something "big"- of course, in the end they turned out just fine, but I was freaking out before. Now it is only holidays and trips and a bit of a work. Whatdid you do your PhD in? And have you finished it?
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